Bit-o-Pep!

awww :)

Though it's Thursday, this isn't EXACTLY theoretical...

Just a few days ago, A started rotations. I'm already feeling lonely :( He says goodbye to me when it's still dark out, so I can barely recall his face when I wake up hours later. I'd gotten used to having him around in the morning, so now it's almost too quiet.

And when we get home from work in the evening, he has to study-up for the next day, only to go to bed a few hours later. There's so little "us" time now.

But instead of dwelling on that fact, I'm gonna pep-talk myself out of this. I need to figure out how to make the most of our 3-4 hours a night together, and I need ways to stay positive the rest of the day. Perhaps my pep-talk will drag you out of your funks too? Now that would make me happy :) Here I go...

1) Make the most of the time you share with people. On a coffee-date with friends, in the break room at work, or sitting down to dinner with your work-a-holic husband, really listen to the person talking. Get outside of yourself and focus your attention on them. That way, when you're alone, you have all those wonderful conversations to keep you company. In particular, I need to make the most of my time with A. Even when he's studying and it's "quiet time," I can make a point to focus on him. Touch him (foot massage?). Look up from my magazine every once in a while and really see his face. Otherwise, without these catalogued memories, I'll feel like I never saw him.

2) Get creative. When I'm drawing, coloring, cutting, or pasting, I foreget I'm alone. It's just me and what's in my hands. It's like an entirely different part of my brain--that has nothing to do with analyzing, over-thinking, or stressing--is functioning. And if I play some music or TV in the background, I go even further outside of my head. Perhaps something wildly beautiful will come out of your creative activity. Frame it? Display it? Pass it on as a gift?

3) Clean house. I've said it before and I'll say it again--go about cleaning as if it's a meditation. Put on some relaxing music, and try not to think about anything other than the activity itself. It's a quiet kind of work, cleaning, but it's productive work. In just a few hours time, you've got yourself a sparkling house and a peaceful state of mind.

4) Bake. A few days ago, I baked a quiche, and it made me so happy! I made it so that A would have easily microwavable leftovers, and seriously, the entire time I was chopping up vegetables and whisking eggs, I was thinking about him. I was with A the entire time it took to bake that quiche. And it felt good. Something about having a nutritious creation to show for myself made me feel nurturing. And capable. Like, I can do this. I can be happy so long as I'm taking care of A. (You think this cake is too challenging? Would I be making this for A or for me? Hmmm...)


5) This is related to #4: Do thoughtful things for your loved ones. In regards to A, I don't wanna lose touch with him. With him gone so much, I realize I'm going to have to build my life outside of him. BUT! I don't want to grow away from him, either. So taking time to think about him and do something small for him every day will prevent any distancing. Love messages on Post-It notes? Yummy baked and/or cooked meals? Waking up with him some mornings? Bringing home dessert from the restaurant I went to with my girlfriend? I want him to know that I'm thinking about him even when we're apart.

6) Exercise. Besides the good that comes of getting in shape, exercise is a positive way to kill time. And it requires your full attention. There ain't no time for loneliness when you're sweating buckets! Not to mention, the endorphins make you feel good about yourself. They're "the happy drug," which means that you'll be nothing but positive energy. And there's a lot to be said for your effect on people--happy breeds happy. Because I don't wanna further stress A out with my down-in-the-dumps, a happy front is necessary. Therefore, Erin, meet your new friend, Exercise.

7) Drink more caffeine! Just this morning, I was in a bad mood because of the aforementioned reasons and because it's dark and rainy outside and because I'm hormonal. (I'm just a can of worms, aren't I? You'd think it was Terrible Tuesday what with all this complaining, huh? Lemme turn this thing around...) So, I got to work, drank my usual one cup of coffee, and started to feel better...but not great. So I poured myself a second cup of coffee, whereupon things started to look up! Even when my boss said it was now SNOWING outside, I thought to myself, "How lucky that I'll be inside all day, with my hot cup of coffee and space heater!" Whaaa?! Atypical reaction, I tell you. And one I owe to caffeine. Perhaps I owe my dear ol' friend a thank you note? "Dear caffeine, thank you for perking me up!" (Pun intended. Hard).

Aaaand, that's all I've got at the moment.

Pray pass on YOUR positive ponderings (Alliteration is always awesome!).