PART 2: New and Improved 2011 WishList!

Time to get wishy-washy!

Er, just wishy, that is.

1. I want to rekindle my relationship with God. If that means going to weekly services, going on a retreat, or better yet, adopting a daily practice of some sort, then so be it. Are you guys familiar with Michelangelo's "Creation of Adam" painting? God is stretching as best He can to touch Adam, yet Adam isn't even trying to reach God (brathole). Well, I'm Adam. And it's high time I make an effort to reach God, once and for all. What do y'all do to get friendly with the High and Mighty?

2. Create art! My company's employee art show really inspired me. The variety of vision! I believe art is unique in its ability to stretch the mind beyond regular, boring consciousness, and I believe that creating art, myself, will nurture good mojo. Not to mention, since Christmas, I've come into some major art supplies! Perhaps I'll not keep a lick of what I make, but rather gift it all! Now that's major mojo!

3. I really, really, really wanna visit more museums. A couple months ago, when my friend A was in town, we went to the Denver Art Museum, and I can't tell you how much I enjoyed seeing new things and reading the artworks' captions. I've missed learning! I guess it's because I don't know much, so I've got a lot of brain space to fill ;) Add to my 2011 itinerary the Denver Museum of Miniatures, Dolls, and Toys, the Denver Museum of Contemporary Art, and maybe even the Four Mile Historic Park's Living History Days, to see what a day in the life of a Colorado pioneer was like!

4. I want to be one of those people with a permanent smile. You know the type--even as their face rests, they look like they're smiling; they exude happiness, always look refreshed, and seem to have nothing but nice things to say. Basically, I want to embody the surface of water--sparkling and fluid. So I guess that'd make my 2011 motto: "I feel pretty! Oh, so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and bright!"


5. I want to play more! Not take things so seriously. This past year, living an "adult" life of house chores, bills, pets, and errands, I got caught up in the "to dos." This next year, I hope to have more fun. You know, laugh easily, be sillier, goofier, dance like no one's watching...

 ...I guess that's not a stretch. :-/

6. I want to get more involved in my various social circles--with my coworkers, with my Colorado friends, with my long-distance friends, with my family. After-work drinks? Doggie playdates? E-mail marathons? Weekly dinners with the fam? Yes, yes, yes, and YES!

7. This next year, I'm gonna take more interest in my teeth and feet. You read right--teeth and feet. I'm gonna floss, I'm gonna gargle, I'm gonna whiten, and maybe, just maybe, I'll start wearing my lip-bumper to bed (Sorry, husband). And my poor feetsies! I swear I'll soak em this year and scrub em and lotion em and paint their nails! Pretty feet are mine to be had!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/41690125@N08/3876323804/sizes/l/

8. I'm not expecting our bank account to burst with spending money any time soon, so I want to make the most of 2011 by taking faux-vacations--if that means eating more ethnic food, taking day-trips to various parts of Colorado, learning phrases in other languages, or watching foreign films, then faux-travel I shall! Yeah! Ja! Si! Oui!

9. This one, no doubt, is gonna be easier said than done, but--I want to pause and take deep breaths. Frequently. Writing this 2011 Wish List, I'm struck, yet again, by how lightning fast time flies. This year's over? Already?! Mama mia sopapilla! If years are gonna slip through my fingers anyway, I at least want to notice their passing. I want to pause, take a deep breath, look around me, and then make a mental note of the moment. And I wanna do it ev-er-y-day. "Good luck, Chuck," you say? Why, thank you kindly :)

10. Leaving the most worrisome for last--I want to cook more. Thanks to A, I'm no longer scared of the kitchen. I actually feel comfortable making a variety of foods and can claim fame for a handful of delicious items--oatmeal pancakes, egg scrambles, boxed macaroni & cheese ;) But there's much to be tried and tested, and let's be honest, leftovers are the best, so...Joy of Cooking, here I come! Unless, of course, you'd all like to send me your favorites recipes, yes?

Now stop your dilly-dallying and

tell me what you're wishing for in 2011!

PART 1: New Year, as in New You

It's that time again. It's time to dream.

http://luckylindt.tumblr.com/page/223

As with all new years, I'm suddenly filled with loads of hopes and wishes. It's the darndest combination of something ending with the beginning of something new that gets me to dream, but hey, I'll take it!

***

Last year, my hopes for 2010 included:

Getting outside of myself in order to feel like a part of everything else.
Exhibiting a sparkling personality.
Gaining a meditative attitude towards chores.
Dressing fancifully.
Performing random kindnesses.
Spending time outdoors and paying attention to the changing seasons.
Growing long hair.
Finding the good in every person.
Writing more
And organizing my living space.

How did my hopes pan out?

I didn't volunteer once, which is sacrilegious, though I did organize an employee art show at my work place to feel more connected to my coworkers. Nothing like a little art to create a sense of community.

There were many times I exhibited a, need I say, lackluster personality, though, on a brighter note, I feel like I've learned from those unshiny moments :-/

Keeping house while working full time and training a Great Dane puppy was "muy dificil" to say the least, though I'm flabbergasted I kind of enjoyed the manual labor. For the past couple months that A's been off school, he's taken over the house-chores, and again, I'm flabbergasted to say that I miss getting my hands dirty. There's something about working for a clean house that is so satisfying...

Dressing fancifully, eh? Again, with a full-time job and the new addition of a Great Dane puppy, my "personal care" went down, down, down...But hey, I showered! Though I so enjoy looking primped and perfect, I've really come to appreciate a "laid-back style," as well. Wet hair and no mascara to work?!?! Sure! As long as it's just once a week and paired with some pretty earrings ;)

I didn't perform as many random kindnesses as I would have liked. It seems I used my free time for other things--namely, playing with Bishop and dating my husband...activities which, I'd like to believe, left me a kinder person at least.

I spent most of the summer outdoors, either running or walking Bishop, and am pleased to say that I remember many "season-changing" moments from this past year--Spring's frosty dew melting and softening the grass; Summer's weeds' soury smell; Fall, with the leaves changing color from the inside out, on fire within; and Winter's first freeze chilling my lungs and making it hard to breathe...

http://salement.tumblr.com/

Which brings us to...ah yes, growing long hair. Ain't that a forever kind of story. I guess I semi-succeeded in that I haven't "cut" my hair all year. Granted, I don't have Alanis Morisette hair either. And so it goes...

I hate to tell the truth about my "finding the good in other people," but alas I shall. 2010 was kind of stressful for A and I, and while that's no excuse, it did affect my "loving nature." My preoccupied mind had a rough time opening up and seeing it all sometimes. However, I can say this with conviction, I came to deeply appreciate the good I already knew was in people, for instance in my family and friends. I got to be pretty obsessed with my loved ones, thanking God for them whenever I could, and trying my best to stay present in their presence.

Now, writing I've done. Thanks to this here blog, my new freelance writing business partner, the AppleHouse Poetry Workshop, and my long-distance friends' willingness to e-mail, I left quite the 2010 paper trail! And thanks to my kindle, I read more, too! Woohoo for language!

Last but not least, my hope to keep an organized house. Though our shelves aren't always dust-free or our floors spic-and-span, A and I have come to take pride in our home. We do our best to care for the space--fixing the broken, sprucing the fixed, and of course, filling it with love. It's exactly where we wanna be...

***

As you can see, my 2010 hopes had various results--disappointment, flying-colored success, and, as always, surprise. I couldn't have asked for more :)

http://inspiredbythisfeeling.tumblr.com/

Which is why I'm "wishing and hoping and thinking and praying, planning and dreaming" all over again!
As you should, too! Let's set the stage for some more bursting-with-life happenings, what do you say?!

Stay tuned for my 2011 Wish List!

And I'll stay tuned for yours!

One Year Anny!

Whoda thunk that these two crazy characters...

...were capable of something so beautiful...

...LOVE.

(Sap on top of sap on top of sap, I know :-/

What can I say? I love me some cheese, hehe).



This past weekend marked A's and my one year wedding anniversary,
yet I feel like we've just now begun something incredible.

Our first year of marriage was blissfully honeymoon-like. Though we had our fair share of troublesome moments--finding little time for each other amidst our busy work schedules, the responsibilities of a house and bills and dog, and--putting the two together--being distracted by our various responsibilities during the little time we shared together--we've arrived at a blessed place. 

Every day my husband inspires me--with his kindness, his generosity, his soulfullness, his intelligence, and, most of all, his overwhelming ability to love. That one there--love--he embodies that word and then puts it into action as though his heart knows no different. He spoils me to no end--cooking, cleaning, playing with my hair, telling me he loves me every time he talks to me. He's truly the best person I've ever known.
And he loves me?! Maybe he really is crazy ;)

For reals though, he's been my best example of the human being I want to be.

He shows me how it's done.

And I'll be going straight to heaven for marrying this one :)

On this occasion of our first year anniversary, I can't help feeling like we're just floating down a lazy river, basking in the gift of another beautiful day, happy to be in each other's company...It's that easy. And right.

And if you're anything like A and I, we like to celebrate things of that nature.

SO THE WARES WENT TO BOULDER!

We spent a good amount of time on Pearl Street,
shopping and eating
and generally freezing our patooties off,
but despite the cold temps, it was fun to revisit our old stomping grounds.
God bless you, Blue Skies, Boulder Bookstore, Bliss, Common Era, and Paper Doll :)

Then we dressed to the 10s and went to dinner at Boulder's finest--Flagstaff House.

We sat right next to a panoramic window that overlooked Boulder's city lights,

and good Lord was it romantic! Everything was a'twinkling!

For starters, I had this incredible salad with

golden beets, roasted pistachios, sauteed chard, and goat cheese.

IN. CRED. I. BLE.

I'd eat it everyday if I could.

And A had this creamy gnocchi that melted in your mouth!

For my main course, I tried a new fish

--John Dory: a really thin, white, and mellow-flavored filet--

that was crispy on the outside

and served overtop sauteed spinach and HASHBROWNS!

I could not stop eating it, it was so good.

And A had the filet mignon, that "cut like butter,"

and so was promptly deemed "Top Eats."

The food was GASTRONOMICALLY superior,

the atmosphere ROMANTICALLY supreme,

and our happiness levels ASTRONOMICALLY blissful...

...so we were clearly tuckered out by 8PM.

Which is why we spent the night at the Westminster Westin Hotel...

...and then ordered room service for breakfast ;)

Though we may not always have the time or resources to make such wonderful anniversary plans,
I hope we always find a moment to stop and look at each other,
say, "I love you,"
and then kiss like it's the first in our married lives...

To the beautiful human being that is my husband--
A, I love you now and forever. Like whoa.
XOXOXOX
<3

Holidaze

Tomorrow is our company's holiday party, and I have to say, I'm kind of excited about it :)

We've got some catered food happening, a white elephant gift exchange, beer and wine, and the winners of the company art exhibit will be announced! Which I'm thrilled went over as well as it did. I've been hearing such good things about displaying employees' art in the work place, mainly that it added to the already good morale at our company by increasing everyone's sociability and personability, for it gave everyone something to talk about! And this time of year carries with it such a warm and happy atmosphere anyway (Right now I can hear laughter all the way from the other end of the office). And our made-over cubicle walls! Don't even get me started...Perhaps we'll make it an annual type deal???

So that's all the good stuff. The not-so-good stuff is that my brother and some friends and I signed up for a marathon relay in January...and I'm outta shape. Why is it SO. HARD. to work out in the winter, I ask? My motivation has run far far away, it's freezing outdoors, and I'm so tiredddddd this time of year. Basically that adds up to me blowing off exercise. I know, I know, just last week I was bragging about our EA Sports Active videogame. Welp, this week I'm UNbragging...I think my issue is that I don't enjoy exercising alone. I don't have enough drive, myself, to get my butt in gear, but if someone else were working out with me, well then...Any volunteers???

Let's go back to the good stuff. It is Christmas-time afterall. Oh my gosh, it's Christmas NEXT WEEK! Good God, can you believe it???

I wanna make a point these next few days to look at Christmas lights. You know, really enjoy them. I wanna take a moment to breathe in the cold air, let it make my eyes water so that the lights twinkle and blur, and then breathe out a foggy Christmas cloud...

...and then whisper a quiet, "Happy birthday, Jesus."

Wishing you all the best holiday ever :)

*image from http://3-times-l.tumblr.com/page/5

Tis the Season (for a long-winded blog post!)

Gosh, folks, it's frickin' December!

While I can't believe we're in the last month of 2010, I'm already in a New Year's frame-of-mind. I woke up today feeling like a feather on the winds of change...

I want to, no need to, start writing again. Not only are there too many lengthy lapses here in my blog, but I think my brain's losing its luster for lack of practice. Operation Erin Wants Her Shiny Brain Back is now underway...


A and I are on a "health kick" these days. We're trying to eat better, exercise, and lose weight (Bold, considering it's the holidays!). So he bought us a new video game (Seems anti-productive, I know). It's called EA Sports Active 2 for PS3. Pretty cool gig, if you ask me. You wear these arm and leg straps that have motion sensors in them (So it's a hands-free type deal. No wand) as well as a heart rate monitor so that you can see how hard your body's working and how many calories you're burning! Last night we did some trail running, a few push-ups, some boxing, a few soccer drills, mountain-boarding, and skipping! I'm telling you, this game's got variety galore! I'm actually excited to try it again tonight (If that ain't saying hell's frozen over!). I've just gotta get in the habit of moving and staying motivated until this coming January. See, six months ago, my mid-summer self told me, "I can totally run 6.5 miles come January!" So yeah, that. I'm officially hard-at-work making that a reality :-/

Speaking of "healthy habits"--I recently read some trainer or other's quote about how to avoid snacking...

...She said something like, "When you feel a little hungry and want a snack, try going without one. Despite your brain telling you that you're hungry and despite a little growling in your stomach, skipping a snack won't kill you. Literally, you won't die." Gosh, if that didn't change my mind about things! I am one of those people who stashes snacks in my purse, car console, desk drawer...and pocket, if you must know! Because God forbid I not eat every hour on the hour! Now, I'm not suddenly promoting starving, so don't go misinterpreting. I'm simply promoting the option to not eat something every hour. What a revelation, I tell you! I'll let you know if my body takes a hint ;)

Also, I'm a bit late on the uptake, but I just started reading Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love.

Have you guys read this book? Only a few chapters in, I'm noticing a subtle shift in my thinking. The author presents her life's desire--to live an earthly life so deeply and richly while at the same time being a dear and devoted friend of God's; to be fully present in this physical world while simultaneously being present within the Supreme Being. Gosh, if she didn't put my hope into words! No more feeling guilty about enjoying myself, for it's easiest to experience God in those moments. Those moments are His gifts to us. And I can vouch for seeing God more recently, as it's the holiday season and (most) everyone is at their joyful-est. I've been seeing Him in my coworkers' smiling faces, my husband's calm and contented presence, my mom's embodiment of the Christmas spirit. So, thank you Elizabeth Gilbert for reminding me of what I already know--how experiencing the physical world can sometimes catapult you into experiencing God...

...AND it's been eye-opening to read about humanity's time-consciousness--how we bewail the end of a day because there's just never enough time and forever asking ourselves how we might pause this unstoppable progression forward. And boy if I haven't been feeling incredibly rushed lately with 2011 just a couple weeks away! For the arrival of 2011 means A's back in med school! It means he's a busy-body and I'm a busy-body, too! But I haven't lived it up enough in 2010! I haven't done THIS year its due justice! It means this year is OVER! If that doesn't make me want to dig my heels in and yell, "STOP!"

But like Elizabeth Gilbert writes, "At some point you have to stop because [time] won't." Despite days whizzing by, despite our schedules filling up and overflowing, we've gotta make a point to stop chasing life. Instead, we've gotta just let time come. And we've gotta sit in it. And then we've gotta let it pass.

Whenever we're feeling rushed or feeling like time's running out, we've gotta just sit back, take a deep breath, nod at the ticking clock, and instead of looking ahead, look around ourselves...and then smile in the bubble of that moment. That's how I'm gonna spend these last few weeks of December...

Speaking of which, do y'all have Advent calendars? A and I've got one that has pockets for each day, which put the thought in our heads to give little gifts/notes/candies to each other every day until Christmas. Lemme just say that I recommend this idea whole-heartedly, as the experience of thinking of/writing to my husband every day has been a precious treasure. Making a point to do something loving every day has been a wonderfully fulfilling practice :)

I'll leave with you something A said to me in response to my above thoughts/feelings...

"This is the best time of year because it helps us remember our blessings."

So off I go, my dear readers, counting YOU as one of my MANY blessings.

Happy Holidays to you :)

This Last Little Bit of November

WTF?! The Cherpumple is what! Click on the link below to read about this monstrous dessert...

Good news, dearhearts!

My company's employee art exhibit is officially underway! I'm displaying some word/picture collages and Asa's letting me enter some of his famous photographs...

Other employee artworks include pottery, cross-stitch, stained glass, paintings, graphic novel artwork, and more!

ALSO! The Ware house's Christmas decorations are UP!

Elf Advent calendar!

Porcelain Christmas train in the alcove!

Lit pine-tree garland on the kitchen countertop!

Lastly, but perhaps most importantly, Thanksgiving is THIS THURSDAY! Oh, how my stomach longs for a piece of Cherpumple! And mashed potatoes and stuffing and buttered rolls and green bean casserole and...

Eee! Eee! And eee! Eees all around, I tell you!



Pray enjoy this last little bit of November. I know I will  :)

November = Thank You Month

I knew Fall had some good things in store for me...

This past weekend, my best friend from Baltimore was in town! We ate delicious food (insert swoon for d bar's macaroni and cheese! and double swoon for their chocolate cake!), got massages, ran around in the park, played some boardgames, and watched plenty of movies, of course. It was so lovely to just be in her presence again :) Granted, her visit was bittersweet as well. Back in the day, when we were in college and on holiday breaks, we used to spend an entire week visiting each other! But with so many miles between us now and full-time jobs on our plates, 2-3 day visits are all we've got. And though I'm thankful for any time we get to share, our visits just don't cut it like they used to. Much like how appetizers just whet one's palette, I want more!!! Not to mention, I was a little depressed after she left because the fact that we're all grown up now sank in even deeper. And so it goes, I guess...


Granted, late last night, when I took Bishop out to potty, I felt a moment of uplifting. I couldn't help staring up at the sky. It was so dark, pitch black really, with gray clouds slowly creeping across the sparkles of stars...

It was beautiful! And the smell of the air! Crisp yet smokey. I just stood still for a bit, breathing deeply, feeling so thankful for the moment--the sky, the air, Bishop, our home that was at that very moment shedding its warm light across the lawn like a beacon in the darkness--and was overwhelmed with gratitude for my very existence in this incredible world...

...which brings me to your dose of ooey-gooey and lovey-dovey for the day. I'd like to thank my husband A for all the housework he's been doing recently. With a couple months off, he's been killing time cleaning floors and doing laundry, and basically lightening my domestic load. And, and, and! We've been going on dates! Finally we've got time to, well, spend time together! It's been utterly fantastic! Granted, I'm realizing that even when people are busy and seemingly time-crunched, dates have to be a priority, for putting off "time together" till your schedules allow for it means just that--putting it off and putting it off till who knows when! And then where do you wind up? I will forever promote that couples make time to fall in love over and over and over again :)

Also, I've got another of my best friends, A from Chicago, visiting this weekend! Talk about always having things to look forward to, huh?! I'm entirely too blessed to have such good friends who spend the money and take the time to visit me. With plans to visit the art museum and Denver's Tattered Cover bookstore, I can't wait to get all girl-i-fied AND cultured! Hopefully I'll remember to take pictures (or perhaps that's something I could talk my award-winning photographer husband into???).

Last but not least, for all you seasonal-offering fans like myself, Starbucks is serving their Peppermint Mochas again! Fridays just got yummier :)

I hope y'all are enjoying November as much as I am. In the words of a gentleman I recently spoke to on the telephone, "Don't save the thanks for Thanksgiving Day. Make the entire month of November a series of 'thank yous'."

And so, many thanks and <3 to you, dear readers.

A Toast to...

Recently, two of my friends lost loved ones, so I'd like to dedicate this post to them. May the following ridiculosity (a real, though made-up-sounding word that's ridiculous in itself) and jib-jab lighten their hearts and brighten their day :) All my love to you, A and A.


A Toast to...

*Bishop, for sitting on the staircase landing all precious-like, behaving yourself by munching on a chew-toy...er, wait...our RUG?! BAD BISHY! BAD DOG! Now our rug has three corners instead of four.

How unique.

*Canned pickled beets, for satisfying my salty craving while nauseating my beet-hater husband. I enjoy not only your luscious red color (enhanced by the notorious Red No. 2) but also your luscious red taste (thank you, high fructose corn syrup and sodium).

I am excited to finish the other half of the can at work today, out of sight and smell of my root-discriminating husband :)

*Yes and Yes, for picking my husband's photograph for its 2011 calendar! If you're into "quotes, ideas and hilariously real holidays" and "monthly lists to fill in (i.e. "New Things I'll Try This Year" and "Famous People I'd Like To Kiss") and even "space to detail 'Things I Loved This Month' - so you can keep a mini-diary of all the good things that happen in 2011," then get your butts on over there and purchase one, you Silly Sallies!

*Visiting with out-of-state friends, for reminding me that no matter the miles between us or the months between face-time, we've got something special. It's remarkable that we live our daily lives without seeing each other or talking much really, yet when we come together again, it's without having missed a beat. You know why? Because we've got love between us, girlfriends--that good ol' fashioned glue that makes me adore your passions, your smarts, your jokes (good and bad), your quirks, etc, etc. The glue that makes us accept each other for ALL that we are.

That bordered on obsessive, stalker love-letter, didn't it?

*November. You take the tail end of Fall and the the beginning of Winter and really let loose, don't you, November? Because all the leaves in Colorado have changed color, you assume it's time to start blowing them off the branches? As if we can see them better in the muddy grass and gutters. You've also turned the weather a bit nippy, making Bishy's early morning pee runs a blast and a half...of cold air that is.

But in all fairness, you have some wonderful things in store for us, don't you, November? After all, you kick off the holiday season! Thanksgiving! Ain't no better holiday than one filled with warm, hearty food, and a table full of family. Thanks in advance for my stretched stomach :)

*Star of India restaurant, for making A and I realize that good Indian food doesn't mean driving 30 minutes to downtown Denver. To think, just down the street from our suburban house, Star of India is whipping up mouth-watering jasmine rice, naan, palak paneer, aloo gobi...excuse me while I pause to swallow my saliva...and other spicy wonders.

I'm probably gonna have to go there soon/today.

*Our neighborhood, for tricking us into thinking that the million bicycle-crazed, ball-kicking, question-asking, and dog-fearing kids running about the place would be trick-or-treating on Halloween. As the last of the seven, I repeat SEVEN, kids stopped by our house, our Costco bags of candy were not even half-empty. Though I do occasionally enjoy a Tootsie Roll or two, WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO WITH FIVE POUNDS OF LEFTOVER CANDY?! Next time a kid rolls by me on a trike, I'm showering him with handfuls of candy! You have a question about Bishop's relation to Marmaduke? Here's some candy! Did your ball land in our yard? CANDY!

Okay, so maybe we gave em reason to stay away...

Would YOU like to take a pound of candy off our hands???


A and A, I hope you giggled at least ONCE during the above rampage. Know I'm thinking of you...<3

Seasons of Poetry

Because I'm utterly surprised that it's November already, a poetical recap of the year is in order...I hope you enjoy :)

SPRING























This is Just to Say

I just put away
your folded clothes,
warm from the dryer,
on the shelves in our closet.

Stacks of t-shirts,
boxers,
jeans,
and shorts.

I have to say,
I like touching
the fabrics
that hold your skin.


6:23AM

The radio comes on.
I roll over,
seeking your body in the covers. My tired eyes
struggle to make out your sleeping face in the dark—
cheek, jaw, lips slightly parted. I press
my mouth to your warm skin to reaffirm what’s real—
you, me, and the morning.



SUMMER

Afternoon on the Porch

Sitting outside,
I smell your skin—
warm and salty.
Like the earth.
Like sunlight.

The days are growing longer,
plants are greening,
and the ground has thawed.
It feels like rain all the time,
but it hasn’t yet.

We watch a robin in the front yard
—its red belly darker
than the wine in our glasses—
stick its beak into the soft dirt
and come up with a seed.

People say it’s Summer,
and I find myself believing.


Rest Stop



The foothills are bigger than where I am now,
where the grass grows taller than land—
the plains.
 
The horizon’s mirage-y edge
fills my heart with heat,
my limbs with distance.


I will not stay.



FALL

Erin Lee

It reminds me of a memory
the Irish landscape
—meadow, cliff, fog, and shoreline—
the curved edge of an island

The cold waters kiss my coasts,
break me down and round me out
My name a circle of land—
whole


There’s Always Something…


In the night, I woke to
moonlight coming
through the window-shade and
whispering voices downstairs—
only they were echoes from my dream.

Like fog slithering between
hay bales, an unused hanger,
a black silhouette in
a lit doorway—
there are visibles that don’t fill space,
but rather hollow out stomachs
and empty lungs of air.


Like when a person dies—
alive one day, then not.
Yet there’s still
her toothbrush,
her lip-prints
on a nightstand water glass.


Like how there’s always dust
on a windowsill,
a flicker in a candle’s flame,
or a star
just out of reach—
there’s always something
I can’t quite put my finger on.



WINTER

Epithalamium

What will you remember from that day in December
when the snow didn’t come?
Will you remember how it felt—
the lace of my dress between your fingers?
Your cold hands on my neck?
Will you remember the winter sun coming through the unblinded windows?
And how it made our skins look like porcelain?

Or will you just remember that morning?
My eyes golden in the church’s stained glass—
and how they sparkled when I said “I do”?


Prints

She left a glass on the counter,
lipsticked and empty.

The light from the kitchen window
shines through it,
lighting it up like a star.
But all he can see are her lip prints--
a kiss goodbye.

*Photo Credits:
1st and 4th photos: Tyson Beckford
2nd and 3rd photos: Asa Ware

Polka Dots On My Heart

Once again, pray excuse my long absence!

I'm getting to be a Sorry Sally, aren't I? 

I tell ya, life's got me in a tizzy lately...

A and I just got back from our friend's wedding in Ohio...

Isn't she a dream?!

The wedding was so wonderfully personal.

So many details that spoke to the couple's taste and personality,

like polka dot bridesmaid dresses...

...button flowers...

...CD mixes and pinwheels

and a live band that played golden oldies!

To borrow a cliche, it was a wedding to remember :)

Thing is, I tend to fall in love with the differences in people.

I believe that it's the variety of one's friends

that makes our lives exciting.

Take for example our friends the Hetts...

Between a multi-hour car ride, a shared hotel room,

and the wedding events themselves,

we spent a lot of time with them this weekend.

And it was FUN!

Counting the Bob Evans diners,

saying "frickin" every other word,

looking like 80 year-old-women in pashminas,

making late night beer/chip runs

 and/or Taco Bell excursions...

these are the memories they left us with ;)

And right there is the crux of it all--

everyone leaves us with different memories,

personalized memories,

and though we oftentimes 

take our friends and loved ones for granted,

events like this weekend's remind us, me, not to.

This weekend I spent time with such good people,

that it was impossible for me

not to fall in love with them all over again.

All weekend I thanked my lucky stars for

these funny, happy, loving, DEAR people, 

and vowed, from here on out,

to spend every moment I could with them.

Because they are my good examples.

They make make me wanna be better.

<3

P.S. A parting image for y'all...

Yesterday,

driving home from work,

a long yellow leaf caught on my car's antenna.

I was proudly flying Fall's flag :)

Red, Yellow, and Wine

From the tops of trees, red is dripping down, down, down to the trunks...

Half-and half--this is what Colorado's trees look like right now.

I'm in a bit of an existential state-of-mind today (wow, what a mouthful). I don't know whether to blame it on the change of seasons--what with everything I see changing before my eyes--or whether something's happening inside of me. Either way, I've been feeling very small lately...

Fall has always been my favorite season (a redundant statement, I'm sure ;) ) and yet I feel like I'm not ready for it this year. It's like it came out of nowhere. All of a sudden trees are yellow, and I'm stuck looking out the window wondering how the heck I got here...

All year long, I've been waiting for Fall, and now that it's actually here, I'm confused. I suppose it's because I've been so busy looking FORWARD to the leaves turning, to Fall festivals and sweaters, to A being done with his board exam, to wandering through corn mazes, etc, etc, etc, that I haven't been paying attention to the fact that Fall is HERE! NOW! I've been inside my head too much--hoping, dreaming, imagining--that I missed the beginnings of "the turn." And leaves are falling, people!

It's official: the world goes on whether we pay any attention to it or not. Leaves will still burst into red and yellow flames whether or not we see or feel their heat...

Right here and now, I'm determined to play catch up, to pay better attention, to turn my eyes outward and soak in my surroundings. This is, afterall, my favorite season, so how dare I miss out on it! It's time to walk through a corn maze with a hot chocolate in hand...

...to pick up leaves and trace them under paper...

...to open a bottle of wine and sit in front of the fireplace...

It's time I take this small body of mine and get it moving! Live in the moment and all that (while eating candy corn, of course!). Join me?!